Bluffer’s Guide to Teaching Key Stage One


This article originally appeared in the magnificent Teach Primary 3-7.

“Hi, what do you do for a living?”

“I’m a primary teacher,”

“Oh! What age?”

“I teach year two,”

“That…is…..SOOOO cute. Oh my gosh how old are they? Six? Adorable.”

“Yeah I know…” is what I say.

It’s not what I mean. Look at these grey hairs. Look at them. Does adorable cause that? Any adorableness, I’ve learnt, is in fact a very cunning disguise that these tiny whirlwinds of terror have adopted to lull unsuspecting adults into a spider’s web of carnage. Perhaps they have trapped you too. Perhaps, in a thoughtless and utterly regrettable ‘adventurous’ spirit, you agreed to take charge of a class of very small people.

Fear not! Follow this bluffer’s guide and you might just make it to July with some sort of sanity in tact. I’m kidding, of course, you have no chance of…

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